Spacing Out

I'm at it agian. Having insomnia. Sleeping at really late hours and getting up before the birds begin to sing. I'm starting to resemble a panda bear. I'm not truly under loads of stress, neither am I unhappy or upset. I'm just....normal...but still....I can't sleep peacefully.

Even if I did sleep, I wake up numerous times for no reason. Arghh...this is getting frustrating. I really wished I could be like last time, being able to sleep for 8 hours straight. Boy ooh Boy...I miss those days where I can sleep up till 1 in the afternoon.

Classes are alright....I'm glad that I've extremely smart and passionate lecturer's this semester. I expected the work load to be a killer but surprisingly, it's not as bad as last sem where I've to go without sleep for 2 days at a go. I guess...things are going great at Uni now...Less stress and more happier days.

Thinking about graduating and leaving is an extremely upsetting thing. Part of me don't want to leave...yet the other part can't wait to get my degree and join the working world. Maybe that's why I'm loosing sleep. I don't really want the days to pass by so quickly. It seems that this month and the month before were flying before my eyes and before I can even get use to the day itself, its over.

Nothing interesting in my life at the moment. I realized how my friends and I have grown during the past years. My best friends are all in the earning income group ready to pay their income taxes. One is a high-flying stewerdess and the other is going to be a part owner of a boutique. Me....I'm just Amy...plain...boring...ole...Amy.

I wonder what I'll end up doing after I graduate. I'm scared...what if I don't get a job? UgHhHh....the worst part is making a decision of which path I want to take. Should I go back into Advertising, or pursue a career in magazine publishing as a journalist, or do event management under PR or hotel management? This is the downside of Mass Comm...you've too many to choose from. Unlike studying medicine or law. You just know where you're heading to straight on.

Gosh...I wished I had an exciting life. A life filled with meeting interesting people. Oh wait...I DO meet interesting people. But I end up getting either stalked, weirded out or just scared. Yeah...as I said before...I only tend to meet Psychos and dodgy people.

Lately, I've been thinking alot of my past and one particular person kept on popping in my head. Maybe because I found this extremely sweet letter he wrote to me. That was about 3 years ago and I do wonder where he is right now and what is he doing. He was one person I can really say that is beautiful inside and out with a great personality to go with.

He's someone you know that if you end up being with, he'll love you more than life itself and never hurt you. Only thing was....the timing I met him was all wrong. I was still blinded by that idiotic fool who cheated on me. If only I stuck to my decision at that time to leave that idiotic fool. I guess we would be happy right now.

But then agian, things happens for a reason right? Maybe we were never fated to be together. But if i did meet him agian, I would really want to apologize to him. For hurting him.

OhHh...and...what a weird surprise. During my one week vacation, I was out with a friend of mine, just lazing around when I met........*drum roll*....DENNING!!! OMG!!!! I can still remember how weirded out I was!

It's such a waste because he's one hell of a good looking chap. He has looks, height and body. But unfortunately, he was so empty and wierd!!! I remembered him crushing on me so badly that he'll drive all the way from Subang to wherever I was just to pick me up, drop me to wherever I want to go, wait for me in the car and then head back home. He also weirded out Oscar and Liy.

Thinking back to those times...man was it hilarious! That day in particular, I had a photo shoot and needed to pick up some of my portfolio pictures. He insisted on following and when he saw those pictures, he couldn't stop staring at them. Well...fine...if you like looking at them,but please do not make such a big fuss over it. OVER ACTING I tell you!.

Then we headed down town to join Oscar and Liy. He took a liking to Oscar because they both have a common interest. Body building. And when I was away with Liy, he even told Oscar that he'll wait for me no matter how long it takes. THIS is coming from a guy I hardly know okie!!!!

He then started messaging Oscar and calling him which was totally psychotic! In the end, I've to make him stop calling me and Oscar by telling him that I was going out with someone else.

*WEIRDO*

Sigh....it's such a waste...but i guess you can't have everything. God is fair in that point.

Okay...enough of mindless ramblings...I'm going to head back to sleep...try to catch the sleep fairy before it leaves. Toodles!